The Money Gap
Addressing Misconceptions and the harsh financial implications of being transgender .

This Essay is about money.  Or, perhaps more accurately, this letter is about NOT having money.  It is an issue near and dear to me and many friends.  And, I think the time to bring it out into the open has come.

The Gay and Lesbian market is perceived to be a lucrative one.  I've seen numbers estimating that the dollar value of the Gay/Lesbian community is anywhere between $480 billion and $610 billion (see recent gay.com article here).  Whichever number you choose to believe, the fact of the matter is there is a lot of money there, which means there is lots of extra cash to spend.  There are several reasons for this seeming glut of discretionary income.

First, generally speaking, the Gay and Lesbian community doesn't have kids to spend their money on.  They don't have traditional expenses associated with raising a family.  In addition, gays and lesbians have been identified as having above average income levels.  In fact, there is reams and reams of statistical research data on the Gay/Lesbian community and it's size/power/potential as a market.  Check here for one simple source, or here for another.

The fact of the matter is that the gay and lesbian community is perceived as having gobs of extra cash to spend.  And, advertisers/businesses/employers are finding ways to try to get some of it.  More than that, this cash is the lifeblood of GLBT charitable organizations such as the Human Rights Campaign, GLAAD, and others.  Go to any of the gala dinners and you'll see this in action - expensive black tie affairs at posh hotels, with silent auctions full of high-end donated items, and well-known celebrity guests.  It's all designed for one thing - to raise money.  Certainly, it's important to raise awareness and visibility - but at the end of the day the thing being counted is dollars.  That's just the way it is.

I'm not trying to make a judgment statement here.  I'm not giving away government secrets.  The important work being done by these organizations costs money.  And, in order to raise money they approach those who can afford to give, those most affected by the policies and the issues. 

The problem at hand: these research numbers do NOT accurately reflect the transgender community.  In fact, I daresay that a realistic portrayal of the economic health of the typical transgender/transsexual American would paint a very sad picture.  This needs visibility.  This needs to be understood clearly.  Indeed, this needs to change.

The fact of the matter is that it's expensive to be transgender.  In particular, it's expensive to be transsexual.  Here are some simple examples from my own life:  I've spent nearly $100,000 of my own money on medical expenses.  Surgeries.  Psychologists.  Hormones.  Electrolysis.  Is any of this covered by insurance?  Of course not.  Those of us who want these things have to pay with cash, or go into debt to get them.  Those who can't often face some very difficult decisions.  Either way, there is a significant economic impact involved in exposing our transgender nature.  It's expensive to a point that many of us never fully recover. I'd even say that it's expensive to the point that some in our community end up paying with their lives.

Then, there's employment.  How many of us lose our jobs the minute we indicate that we plan to transition at work, or find ourselves somehow isolated to the point where we end up jobless?  How many of us find ourselves unemployed for significant periods of time, despite a history of good employment and achievement?  How many of us find ourselves under-employed, working at jobs way below our expertise level for the simple fact that it's all we can get?  Personally, I have only recently started to approach the income levels I had attained prior to my transition.  And, to be sure, I'm incredibly fortunate in that regard.  The point, however, is that income opportunities are NOT the same for the transgender community as they are for the Gay/Lesbian community.  Often, to be transgender is to automatically be relegated to the fringe, and the economic opportunities for those identified as "fringe" are limited.

Thirdly, whereas Gays and Lesbians typically don't have expenses associated with families - many transgender people are strangled by these expenses.  We have child support payments.  We have alimony.  For years on end.  We have no financial freedom.  We find ourselves facing long-term court-ordered financial obligations mandated by judges unsympathetic to our plight.    I was officially divorced several years ago.  Today, nearly half my income continues to pay this obligation - before a single penny goes towards food, or housing, or gas.  That's the reality many of us face.

Where does this leave us?  In financial shambles, that's where.  We come to a point where we're ready to risk anything and everything and many of us find our once strong financial health ends up floundering in the toilet.  Discretionary income - what's that?  You've got to be kidding!!?  Many of us are fortunate to pay our bills every month.  Life on the street.  Sex work.  Those are brutal realities that far too many of us are forced to confront to make it from one day to the next.  The thought of affording a gala dinner is a ridiculous notion.  The prospect of giving $500 or $1,000 to support a political candidate is outside the realm of possibility.

It is a sad commentary to accept that this culturally imposed poverty that many in the transgender community face is not about to end any time soon.  Personally, I think some consider it to be a punishment - a harsh lesson to be forced upon those who would dare to challenge society's most sacred (and I daresay, their most fragile) tenets.  Is it any wonder those of us who can fade into society as men and women to escape the ongoing punishments inflicted upon those who remain visibly transgender do it?  No.  It's not.  In fact, the fact that more people choose to remain visible AS transgender people who could choose to live otherwise needs visibility as the selfless act of courage that it really is.  But, that's another topic for another day...

To work with/for/among the transgender community is to understand that - as a whole - we're poor.  We're in debt.  We're bankrupt.  We're unemployed.  Whereas there are some who attribute a general non-participation in politics or social causes to apathy, I suggest that a much more realistic culprit is $$$.  It's cash.  When decisions need to be made about putting food on the table this month, or donating to some social/political cause it's really no decision at all.  And, it's not about apathy.  It's about survival. 

Much of the gay community - especially the gay activist community - doesn't seem to get this.  Or, perhaps they just don't want to acknowledge it.  Either way, it is what it is.  And, until and unless the deeper issues the create this gap in the first place are addressed it will continue this way. 

Part of the problem is that becoming an active participant in any of these important efforts has explicit and implicit expectations in terms of financial support.  Many of us don't have money.  We have passion.  We have energy.  We have ideas.  We have relationships.  We're willing to donate the things we do have (and perhaps even some things we may not have so much of, like time) because we believe in the greater good.  However, the financial barriers - real or perceived - keep us away.  And, as long as there is a financial implication to 'help', there will be those who simply can't.

Much of the work currently underway is designed to change this.  It's all inter-connected.  By helping companies to understand the things it can do to support its transgender employees (health care benefits, job security, opportunities for advancement) we're doing more than establishing acceptance in broader society.  We're helping to triage the financial health of the transgender community  - one employee at a time.  In Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs were working to secure the lower level needs (security, self-worth, etc.) that must necessarily be addressed before moving on to more complicated self-actualization needs.  In the bigger picture, that's really the goal, isn't it??  As I say - it's all inter-connected.

Make no mistake.  There IS a money gap.  It exists internal to the trans community.  It exists in relation to the Gay and Lesbian community.  It exists in relation to society as a whole.  The realization that our economic well-being is endangered the minute any of us acknowledges our transgender nature is simply part of self-acceptance.  However, it's one thing to realize that it exists but it's a whole other thing to accept it as okay, or as simply part of the process.  It's not.  It's wrong.  It's not fair.  It's existence needs to be acknowledged.  And, it needs to be fixed.  Fundamental things need to change in order for that to happen.  The question is, are any of us going allow the very thing that most needs to change prevent us from getting involved to change it?  That's a question that each of us needs to answer for ourselves.

[posted 2/14/2006]